I really must stop doing this.

Sometimes I think a lot of things would be easier for me if I were less interested in almost everything. Or better at balancing many different interests. Because I want to do everything justice and end up doing justice to absolutely nothing.

The simple and sour example of the moment? The 'Hard Times' business. I don't like his works much, I don't want to spend time on them, I told myself, but I went and got myself fascinated. This tendency (trait? habit? temperament?) would be a source of much joy but for all these real-world limitations. I hate that we get so little time to find out stuff, in the semester system. I hate that I'm an ignoramus (but no use crying over the past, is there). I hate that one day I'll have to choose something to specialise in. I want to know everything, but I don't want to specialise. Which would be... wonderful, except I'm not a genius.

Utterly ridiculous.

--

I watched 'Master and Commander' last night, nursing my frozen right shoulder against the wretchedest pillow in the world. The film brought back all these memories. Haha, nothing interesting, just... being in ninth grade and reading Patrick O'Brian and being a nerd about sailships. And why did that get cut off so easily? Because I couldn't get all the books I wanted. Because I realised I'd never get to actually see a sailship for myself. Because I felt bitter.

Story of my life.

I can say from my (limited) knowledge that casting Paul Bettany as Maturin was the best idea ever. Maturin... think of Gray's Anatomy, except done in watercolours. Paul is like that, too, he is perfect in this role.

I hope they make decent sequels or something. With lots of Aubrey-Maturin story and lots of sailship love.